all the "right" reasons

nothing's really going on today. i just wanna post my disappointment for making the decision not to apply to UC Berkeley! i wouldn't wanna brag about how i would potentially have a chance to be accepted to berkeley and refused to do it because i do not have enough information about it, cuz that would be a total bull and just a piece of shitty arrogance coming out of my mouth (but that was the excuse i told ppl today). that is probably ( i am not even sure why the hell did i give such reason) just a cover-up for not applying to prevent the downfall of my pride from happening later if my application to Berkeley was declined, which i'm pretty sure would be the case. i don't know.

yesterday, actually there's this girl, Miyuki (whom I coincidentally just met), who asked me again if Architecture (my intended major currently) is really my passion. that question seems like a god-send to me because: (1.)I just met her and (2.)the many times i heard the question again from myself or even from other people, it always dumbstrucks and shooks me hard in the head and heart because, honestly, i don't have the answer myself. is this God's way of asking me,

"Are you sure this is what you want to do? your passion? your desire?"
"Well, I DON'T KNOW!"

a childish answer I must say. but, considering that i always liked designing stuffs and drawing, i presumed that this might be the right thing for me. but how do you actually sense a right or wrong choice you have made? you wouldn't know the answer to this before you got the result of your choice. and that... wow I drifted too far.

i know i want to take something which majors in art but not limited to art and that is why i feel architecture is for me. another thing is the big bucks that we'd be paid for being one. moreover, i also had ambitions about having my architectural buildings decorating the horizon of the biggest cities in the world. all the "right" reasons.

as a start..

at last... my own blog! not that (having a blog) was my longing desire or anything. lol. its this cousin of mine that's pushing me upon making one, and here it is. lol. and it seems fun too.. so.. there's no harm in making one. lol. ya ngga tel? :p

well. that's my remark for my first blog! lol.

o yea.. Seattle's been snowing for the past 2 days. first day was fun. today.. not so much. buses were out of service due to the slippery roads, so I had to walk and my feet was all wet! damn!